Lip products that do not work for me

Lipsticks, crayons, tints and stains I cannot stand.

Time to spring-clean, and that includes my makeup stash. I found about half a dozen lipsticks I haven't used in ages, that I cannot stand. Terrible staying power. Caking. Flaking. Burning reactions. Blotchy formula. Whatever be the reason, these lip products simply do not work for me.
Before we go any further, here is the disclaimer: Just because something does not work for me it does not mean it would not work for you. You probably love many of these lippies. No fighting or bad-blood intended. I do sound harsh. I will mellow after the weekend, but I still will not like these lipsticks. 

Check out the lipsticks, lip crayons, tints and stains that do not work for me, and why.

Too Faced Lip Injection Color Bomb, reviewed here

Tagline: One thousand and one acid-injection needles burning the skin.
Within seconds, my skin began to burn - "burning, searing pain" - and turned terribly red, and the discomfort did not go away for a while even after dousing with cold water and applying lotion. Look at my review here and see what happened to my skin.

Did I get a dud? I doubt it. Brooke of Blushing Noir had told me last year that she had the same reaction - check out her experience here - and there are others who have had adverse reactions to this, as you can see from Brooke's post. Stay far away unless you want your skin to feel like a bomb exploded. They clearly warn you in the name, you know.
This is an old photograph, from my review post. Can you imagine this on the lips?

L'Oreal Caresse Wet Shine Stain

Tagline: More streaking than seen on Wimbledon Centre Court.
Look at my review of Rimmel Apocalips here. THAT is what a glossy stain must look like. Even. Homogenous. The Body Shop, Benefit and so many other brands have far better lip stains. These go on uneven at first swipe and you need to work on building the colour and blending it to develop some semblance of an even lip. Yes, I'm probably too harsh. I'll mellow next week, promise. But I'm still not going to like this lip stain. Life is too short to work with difficult makeup.
Dud? Nope, bought multiple shades and tried testers.

Maybelline Superstay 14hr Lipstick

Tagline: Super shame 14 minute lipstick
It neither stayed nor was super. I cannot believe I actually went out and bought this; a total waste of my money. A dry, non-lasting formula. Did it last 14 minutes on me?? To rub salt into my wounds, Maybelline sponsored a blogger giveaway to launch these and I won, but never received my prize. Not after two years and multiple emails to the sponsor and the host. Boo!
I was SO mad at not receiving my prize that I didn't even bother to review it and give the brand a mention here. Sometimes, a grudge isn't just a place to park your car, not when people withhold your rightfully-won makeup prizes.
Dud? Nope, tried multiple shades; you're better off buying the £1 lippies from MUA.

L.A. Splash Chubby Twists, reviewed here

Tagline: It took the cake. 
Reviewed here, so you can see how dry and cakey this thing was. I got this in a beauty box and you can see the cakes in the centre on the lower lip - this is worn over EOS lip balm on exfoliated lips, and you can see the caking in the swatch as well, so it isn't my dry-lip-flakes to blame.

Dud? I got this in a beauty box and haven't got any duds from said box. But that is no conclusive proof.

Origins Liquid Lip Color

Tagline: Baby you set my lips on fire. 
The strong menthol smell should have warned me. You know that uncomfortable cold sensation that some lip products have? The fiery cold sensation. Yep. Very uncomfortable. This is not an adverse reaction or an allergy but even the SA says this feels cool on the lips. I LOVE Soap & Glory's iconic Sexy Motherpucker, reviewed here, and that contains bee venom, so my tolerance level is quite high. 
Dud? Because the shade was dusty rose, I had bought TWO of these from Macy's. Both feel exactly the same.

Dior Serum de Rouge

Tagline: Lips VapourRub
It seemed to evaporate from my lips. I bought this after a break-up (one MUST buy makeup after a break-up, see?) and loved the packaging. Sad part is, the packaging is the best thing about this lipstick. You don't even need to sip water; the colour just vanishes by itself. Check out an old review here, posted during the Dark Ages of this blog. 
Dud? At this price? Seriously??

Legally separated

Where the colour is divorcing the gel.

Both these are soft lip creams with a hint of colour and are not full coverage.  Problem is, the colour part comes out in little globs, and neither of these is an old, separated product!
Again, I know these are not duds because I ended up buying the entire range from Bourjois when La Creme Des Levres came out. As for the Rose Mine tint, which I got in a Memebox, it comes out from the tube in clumps of gel-colour which is hard to even out.


And the worst lipstick ever; binned, so not in photo. Go here to see a photo. Drumroll...

M.A.C ProLongwear Lip Colour

Bits of flaked strips 
Hanging from my lips
Down towards my hips....
Sorry about the bad rhyme, but that is pretty much what it did. Buy it if you want to dress up as a cannibal or zombie. Double ended. With and without the glossy topcoat, it dries terribly, flakes off after a while and the flaky bits hang off the lips like flesh (dusty rose shades do look like flesh). Yes, I have had embarrassing moments around my colleagues.
Dud? I bought Passion Preserved, Stuck on You and For Keeps and all three flaked off my lips. Double-ended liquid lipsticks have been perfected by Rimmel, CoverGirl, Stila, MUFE, Estee Lauder, Chanel and other companies, without flakes.

Ever had a lipstick that did not work for you? Tell me about it in the Disqus comments widget below.